Why thy answers make me so tired?
Or absence of them …
Why people are what they are? Why I am what I am?
Why so many gaps? Inside me and around? Why that shall hurt me? Why I can’t get used? Why is so heavy?
Why in my world is natural to give all … and to receive all …? Why in my world is natural to be spoiled without explications or remorseful?
Some people are idiots … like me, living mendaciously and telling them self, that someday every thing will be different … that things are not so black how look like sometimes … that you can believe, with out the risk of weeping, as I told you, some people are idiots.
Things are sometimes good, sometimes bad, people are sometimes good, some other times just full of wickedness, but all the time hidden … we got used to be deceived , in a recipe in which lie and hypocrisy become traditions … taboo … an sincere behavior will be obviously abnormal … and will be treated like that. Why? Why not to say what you feel, why not to say what you think? Why to roundabout, to avoid, to evade always what is so evident. Unspoken things become bitter, they always comeback against us, this is a golden rule, why to hide so much of you … of what you are … hiding your whishes, your thoughts, your dreams ? We teach us to live lying ourselves and laying thy other around … words are losing their power and we can not say anything … just meaningless things, frivolous overtone, deceitful, coreless … words are losing their essence and we stop talking, just miming … like parrots do saying thousands of phrases without meaning, absolutely without meaning, they are empty … we are full … of blankness.
Sometimes we was able to talk, thru one look, thru one smile or thru a kiss, now we discovered that we can deceive and lie, and is much easy … when we hide from thy others we loose our right to expect people to know what is happening to us … and to understand us, we are just people, we cant get help if we don’t ask for it … we cant help, if nobody ask that … but the blankness from us become to big … we cant think clearly, we ceased to react long time ago, we react only at impulses, from instinct … from fear, from fear we are hiding.
May be people will love each other more … if they are not so hidden, we have all as much to lose if we are sincere, but rather sooner or later we will see, that we are lost everything because of our lies, because we were hiding , because we were deceiving.
It’s your choice. Make it a wise one.